Well, if you wanna throw the entire FCC into jail, go ahead and try to get it done; I'll sit back and watch...

Seriously, if you've ever looked at a broadcast spectrum chart (one of the pre-digital TV ones; seems like they were in every public school science classrom at one time) you should have noticed that the UHF and VHF portions of the spectrum used by broadcast TV took up about 70 percent of the available bandwidth. That's a damn big chunk, and what's left was already getting filled up by the time the decision to convert to digital broadcasting was made; the FCC could have figured out ways to delay that decision (of course) but not for too much longer, given the surge in wireless device usage and the need to make more room in the spectrum for those devices (which just happen to perform best in the very same portion of the spectrum used by those same analog TV channels).

In your case, I'd dump the rest and go with high-speed internet. Most of what's on broadcast, cable, or satellite is crap anyway and you can generally get what is worth watching online. I know a few folks who've been burned by both cable and satellite providers when they jacked up their rates who've switched to high-speed internet and they're mucho happier with it (I'm gonna do that myself, 'cause I sure as hell don't like Comcrap... er, Comcast and I don't care for what the satellite outfits have to offer, which ain't much better).